WISCONSIN'S HARDEST ROCKIN’ PARTY BAND SINCE 2004

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CHRIS

 

Nickname: Beefer, F-Dog, 8-Ball, Goldilocks with the Big Nose, Mother-T of the Vatican Vice

 

Greatest Accomplishment: Being happily married to my wife Kim and raising our 2 awesome sons Brian and Zach.

 

One Embarrassing Moment: My first (and last) time I wore white pants to high school (it was in the 80s and I was trying to pull off the Miami Vice look). I took a public bus to school and happened to sit on a seat with graffiti on it. Apparently the hotness of my butt crack combined with the fact that the artist used a non-permanent red marker resulted in my walking around with a red streak going up the butt crack of my pants for an entire day. Screw Don Johnson and his stupid white pants. I'm still embarrassed.

 

Some Favorite Memories (personal): Growing up - playing with my neighborhood buddies. In grade school - going up north with my family. In high school we pulled a prank where we recorded ‘porno sounds’ on a cassette tape and played it full volume on a boom box locked inside of a locker. It was the most hilarious 10 minutes you ever heard (until the janitor cut the lock and turned off the tape) and the looks on teachers faces was priceless! Now being married with kids I feel like I am living in a comedy movie – funny stuff is happening all the time.

 

Favorite Memory (band): Obviously shows like Summerfest and our Halloween shows, but my favorite memories are about the different people I’ve met and the different situations related to being in a band. Many of my favorite quotes came about because of being in a band, sayings like ‘Do you always sing like that?’, ‘Just because you own an instrument does not mean you are a musician, and 'just because you get together and play does not make you a band’, and ’Don’t you guys own a tuner?’.

 

Best Day: Any day where my family, relatives and friends are doing ok.

 

Worst Day/s: The day my son accidentally kicked me in the jewels. He kicked them so hard I thought I lost them for good.

 

Favorite TV Shows: Seinfeld, Americas Funniest Videos, Whose Line is it Anyway?, Sopranos

 

Favorite Movies: Airplane!, Raising Arizona, Talladega Nights, Terminator, Star Wars

 

Favorite Songs: Whole Lotta Rosie / Shoot To Thrill (AC/DC), Fallen Angel (Poison), Just Got Lucky / Kiss Of Death (Dokken), Forever Free (WASP), More Than A Feeling (Boston), Carry On (Kansas), Wait (White Lion), Purple Rain (Prince), Holy Wars / Wake Up Dead / 99 Ways to Die (Megadeth), Domination / Hostile / Cowboys from Hell (Pantera), Leave My Little Girl Alone (Stevie Ray Vaughn), Talk Dirty to Me / Fallen Angel (Poison), Live Wire (Motley Crue), Wicked Sensation (Lynch Mob), Panama / Hot for Teacher (Van Halen), I'll Remember You (Skid Row), Oasis, Green Day, Obituary, Ratt, Joe Satriani, Steve Vai, etc… Too many to list!

 

Least Favorite Songs/Bands: Mad Season, Asphalt Ballet

 

Occupation: Systems Analyst, application side (for you non geeks, I work with computers)

 

Favorite Songs to Perform: Sweet Child O’ Mine, Dirty Deeds, Crazy Train, Wait, Whole Lotta Rosie, Never Say Goodbye

 

Things You Like: Weather events like snow and thunder storms, eating fries with tarter sauce, playing cards, when my gear works

 

Things You Dislike: Walking into other peoples farts

 

Quote: “When a man is hungry and tired, if there is food he will eat and then sleep. If there is no food, he will sleep.”

 

First Car: 1977 Chevy Impala station wagon

 

Favorite Food/Beverage: Chimi Changas, Grilled Cheese, Ribs, Lasagna, Pizza, Porcupine Meatballs, Doughnuts, Cookies, Cake, Pie, Big Macs, Woppers, Moms cooking...

 

Funniest Story: The day my son crapped in a semi truck wheel rim and cleaned up with a corn dog wrapper. I’m not going into details on this one, but it was funny.

 

Something About You That Most People Wouldn't Know: I am not a certified gynecologist. I have zero experience in marine biology. I invented the Hungry/Tired theory. I am an expert with nunchakus. I can hock a lugie further than anyone you know. On a basketball court I am known as "Radar". I was tackled by a huge dwarf at Haunchyville. I was on a bus with Doro Pesch.

 

 

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